Is it possible to get sick of love?
Pathological love is characterized by care aimed at the partner in an uncontrolled way, becoming a priority for the person in relation to other interests previously valued by them. This condition can be associated with depressive and anxiety symptoms, it can occur in isolation in people with low self-esteem, feelings of rejection, abandonment and anger.
What then would healthy love be?
The healthy way of relating, according to some authors, is permeated by attitudes such as caring and giving attention to the loved one in a way that respects the freedom and space of each one in the relationship with the awareness that the loved one is another individual with their particularities that need to be taken into account. With this, neither an exacerbated individualism nor the total abnegation of oneself in the name of the other should be present in a relationship for it to be considered healthy, but rather a respectful sentimental partnership aimed at the couple’s well-being.
However, not all manifestations of love are healthy. When a subject prioritizes the activities of caring and paying excessively and uncontrolled attention to the loved one, generating emotional damage to himself and to those close to him, a condition of Pathological Love has been characterized, which can manifest in individuals with vulnerable personality, who present feelings of rejection and low self-esteem (SOPHIA; TAVARES; ZILBERMAN, 2006).
In psychological terms, the essence of this pathology is not love, but the fear of loneliness, lack of appreciation and abandonment. Studies indicate a similarity with diagnostic criteria used in alcohol and other drug addiction. The American Psychiatric Association (1994) indicated seven criteria, of which three need to be met for the diagnosis to be closed:
Withdrawal signs and symptoms,
The act of taking care of the partner (a) in greater quantity than the individual would like,
Attitudes to reduce or control pathological behavior, unsuccessful or failed,
Spending a lot of time to control the activities of the partner (a),
Abandoning previously valued interests and activities, living in the interests of the partner,
Pathological love is maintained despite personal and family problems.
State of euphoria similar to that usually induced by large amounts of amphetamine.
Psychotherapy aims to promote the psychic strengthening of the person who experiences this conflict, self-knowledge, appreciation and reinterpretation of their feelings. Get professional help!
